Live Long and Prosper

So here's my Halloween costume as promised. I cobbled it together from spare parts. I bought the shirt only because I can wear it normally without the badge. My mom made the skirt for me out of an old red shirt. The "phaser" is actually a blaster with the Star Wars stuff covered. But at least the badge is on the correct side, this time.

Halloween Plans?

Halloween is my favorite holiday. I love dressing in fun costumes and I love spooky things. I don't have much of a sweet tooth but the candy's not bad either. Today I went to Callson Manor Haunted House with my meet-up group. I was promoted to Assistant Organizer so I organized the meet-up myself. Mwahaha, the power!

Anyway, it was fun and we went to get pumpkin gelato afterwards. I dressed up but I'll show you guys my costume tomorrow because I'm feeling lazy now and tomorrow's actually Halloween anyway. The mall across the street from me has a trick or treat tomorrow and the sign didn't have an age limit so I figured I'd go in costume and see if they'd give me candy.

What are your Halloween plans?

Lost Treasure Found!

While cleaning a wardrobe of my old stuff, I was surprised to find this dried puffer fish which was a present from my friend Tim. I had been convinced I'd lost it, forgotten it in my move and left it hanging from the rafters of my old basement. As much as the imge of the new tenants finding a puffer fish in the rafters amused me, I sorely missed it.

But here it is, never lost at all, and amazingly not even broken! So I've hung it up.

One Stereotype Fits All

Admittedly, my Halloween costume includes a short red skirt (though not as short as the one above, and certainly not as short as the original Uhura's skirt. OMG.) but my costume is downright right respectable in comparison to ALL of the female costumes I saw on sale in the mall. It seems there's only one costume available for adult females. Prostitute.

Where Do They Keep It?

Okay, so I'm planning to go in Starfleet uniform for Halloween but assembling my costume (I never buy costumes, always hodgepodge them together) got me thinking.

Where do Starfleet officers keep their stuff like phasers and tricorders?

You'd think they'd have a utility belt but check out the pic below. She has a PURSE! Okay, okay, not exactly a purse but a fashionable leather strap to hold on her scifi gadget rather than a much-better-in-a-fight utility belt. Of course, it'd be rather embarrassing to fight in a skirt that short anyway...

As for 2009 Uhura, she doesn't even get a purse. Does she keep it in her bra?

Nope, clearly not.

At first, I thought just this problem might only be a girl thing. Surely the men had manly utility belts. But then I remembered the sleek catsuits worn by the entire crew of the Next Generation:

These not only beg the question of where do they keep things, but also how do they do they go to the bathroom?

Don't get me wrong, I love Star Trek, but I think these are some important issues Starfleet needs to address.

Creepy...

Urgh, googly eyes.... So creepy...

Uglies: Audiobook Review

In the first book of Scott Westerfeld's Uglies trilogy, we meet Tally a normal girl who longs to be pretty -- just like everyone else, and soon she will be. In a society where everyone gets cosmetic surgery at the age of 16, everyone's equal. Choices can't be based on looks because everyone is beautiful. But what happens when equality isn't a choice?

It took me a long time to get around to this book because I have a hard time getting into distopian societies. Particularly ones eerily like our own. Tally's image-obsessed world seems purposely designed not to be so far from our own modern day issues with appearance and beauty, and the thought of reading about a world where beauty had won sounded depressing. But when I finally did get it in playaway form from the library, I thoroughly enjoyed this book and have put a reserve on the second one.

A few of the romantic entanglements in the story annoyed me (more on that in the Book Club section at the end of this review), but overall I did find I was able to relate to the main character a lot more than I expected. I was also able to see why teens in particular could relate to the character and the concept as a whole. In a lot of ways this is a story about rebellion and seeing the world in a new light, but also how frightening that is. Westerfeld doesn't take the easy way out and glorify the rebellion. Tally is often terrified by the thought of striking out by herself, and the author allows the reader to see the facts of the society and evalute for themselves what's right. Though they're fact's that are hard to argue with.

Still, the story was more multi-faceted and nuanced than I expected and dealt with more than just beauty, but also questions of the individual versus the group, as well as the ethics of choices.

PLAYAWAYS

The reader, Carine Montbertrand, was quite good. I think female readers often have an easier time being both genders believably. I noticed she made the villain sound a bit like the Wicked Witch of the West, but this didn't actually bother me.

So instead of reviewing the reader, I'd like to review the playaway format since it's the first time I've used it. Playaways, for all of those who don't know, are little devices about the shape and size of a somewhat clunky ipod that carry one audiobook on them. It was convenient not to change CDs, and I certainly see where these would be useful to the large portion of people who no longer have CD players.

But to be entirely honest, I was a little underwhelmed with the quality of the device. The controls are not immediately intuitive and most are not as good as a CD player's controls. The volume, for instance, must be turned all the way up before it can be turned down again. Additionally, to my constant frustration, the play, pause, and power button were all one in the same and I kept forgetting which one it was the first few times and getting stuck in the menu which has a symbol that looks suspiciously like play, but is actually the speed adjustment (although why you would want the reader to sound like an over-excited hamster, I have no idea).

On top of all the issues with the controls, the sound quality is not very good at all. I half expect there to be a tiny little cassette player inside. It's certainly not CD or ipod quality. Then the device itself is a bit flaky. Several times the display froze. I tried turning it off but to no avail. The only way I was able to reboot the device was to take the battery out and then but it back in.

Still, I will admit I put a hold on the next book in playaway format, so I don't hate it completely. Plus, I think I've finally got the hang of the controls. But I hope, and am relatively certain, that these devices will be only a short-lived stepping stone to a far better format soon to come.

BOOK CLUB

I've decided from now on that if I'm going to reveal plot points or spoilers in a review, it can be considered like my own little book club where you're all free to participate or not. Just like in a book club you don't have to have read the book, but just know that I will discuss it in detail as if you had read it.

So I have to admit the love-triangle bothered me. It had everything that usually bothers me about love-triangles like the obliviousness of the main character and the jealousy of the slighted third person. I also sympathized a lot with Shay and was really bothered by the fact that David's admiration of Tally was based on a lie. Shay may never have had a chance with him, but until she was honset with him, Tally didn't deserve one. Even though I actually did like Tally as a character, I couldn't get into any of the romance because of this.

Also, Tally forgets rather easily about Paris. I know she insisted they didn't have a romantic friendship, but he still used to be her best friend. She saves Shay even though she's been made pretty, so why not Paris? Understandably they're pressed for time but she never even It's not his fault he has the same legions as Shay. Perhaps I'll get to see this in the next book, though. I'll just have to wait and see.

I thought the orchid metophor was a bit heavy-handed but not too over the top. I did find it ironic that the pretty rangers dealt with the danger of beautiful sameness choking out all other life every day and they never made the connection to their own beautiful and restrictive homogenous society. It made me wonder whether, even when they have tricky jobs, if they still have a few legions in their brain. Or perhaps literature education just isn't stressed. I guess that is one important use for metaphor though -- being able to see for yourself if you live in a distopian society.

As for the end, I was pretty sure it was going to be a cliff-hanger since it didn't seem possible for them to resolve everything before the end. As cliff hangers, go though, I suppose it's not too bad. If I hadn't liked the characters or plot, then I wouldn't feel the need to see what happens next. So I didn't feel the ending was too much of a cheap trick (my general opinion of cliff-hangers).

Love the Fiction, But Understand the Reality: Or Why The Tudors Needed the Evil Baby Orphanage

Okay, so I saw this Tudors music video on YouTube which I actually thought was well done as far as sappy YouTube music montages of copyrighted material go (Not that I don't love sappy stuff. I totally do). But the comments on the video confirm all my fears about inaccuracies in historical fiction. I'm all for creative license and I've loved many grotesquely inaccurate historical fiction things before: like the cartoon Anastasia. But what always worries me is that people will believe the fiction, and idealize the real thing.

Mary Tudor can be pitied, perhaps even sympathized with. But I cannot agree with anyone who admires her. Yes, Henry VIII treated her horribly, but she still executed hundreds of people in a rather short time. But to be honest, that doesn't bother me as much as allowing herself to be a pawn to a husband who didn't love her and ignoring the governing of her country in favor of producing in heir. The reason Mary's remembered for her executions is because she didn't do anything else! She didn't even try. Elizabeth I may have still executed people too, and I certainly don't admire that, but I do respect her determination to be Queen alone, without a husband, and she did far more for the government.

Anyway, that presents a quandary in my opinion. Both Henry VIII and Mary Tudor were in desperate need of the Evil Baby Orphanage (See John Green's video below). But if Elizabeth I had not had to claw her way to the top after her mother had been beheaded and her own sister wanted her death, would she have been such a strong leader? If she had had a nice and tranquil childhood, perhaps she wouldn't have executed anyone, but would she even be the same person?

I am sure of one thing, though. When I was reading the comments the commenters were saying they hated the "old lady" who played Mary in the movie Elizabeth. But that "old lady" looked far more like the real Mary than the actress in the Tudors ever will. So I am sure that no matter what I do in life, if people have any reason to admire me, I want it to be based on me and not based on how good looking the actress they get to play me is.

YouTube Saves Pies

Or rather, saves me from making pies. There was a clause in my original punishment rules that I could make a vlog instead of a text blog. Normally I post all vlogs here the same day I make them, but that's just a courtesy. Blogger was broken but it hadn't been broken all day, so I didn't see this as a justifiable excuse. As a result, below is my panic-stricken last-minute vlog.

But I would also like to say that I'd like to get things done today and unfortunately I've been slacking off a bit. I've been spending a lot of time with people, both volunteering and in social groups I joined. But I guess I've kinda used it as an excuse to avoid all the stuff I don't want to do. So, here's my To Do List for the day. When I tell other people my plans, I feel more beholden to them, even though you guys aren't likely to ask if I got it all done (but you're free to ask if you like).

To Do:

1.) Order transcripts
2.) Edit Novel (2 chapters)
3.) Study Driving Handbook (1 hour)
4.) Practice Interview Questions (1 hour)

Probably seems meager to all you productive people, and not everything I plan to do or will do is on the list, just the things I'm worried I'll just put off again if I don't write them down.

And now for a panicked last-minute movie:

My New Favorite Song

I figured out that a least half the reason I love the show Lie To Me is because of this brilliant theme song.

Pumpkin Eating Misogynists?

So I told the kids the rhyme of Peter, Peter, Pumpkin Eater today. Just the first part of it:

Peter, Peter pumpkin eater,

Had a wife but couldn't keep her;

He put her in a pumpkin shell

And there he kept her very well.

Okay, so possibly it's just bizarre and not meant to mean anything. But part of me cannot help but feel that somewhere in that nonsensical gibberish, there is something unkind about women. Don't ask me what it is because I don't know; it could be just so weird personal reaction. I'm also not the type of hyper politically correct person to say anything outght to be done about. Clearly, if the intent was to insult women, it's far too bizarre to certainly interpret that, and I don't think it will teach little boys to have strange pumpkin fetishes or teach little girls to seek destructive pumpkin-eating relationships. Still, I've just always felt highly suspicious of this rhyme.

It's just a little clearer why the second line appears to have fallen from favor:

Peter, Peter pumpkin eater,

Had another and didn't love her;

Peter learned to read and spell,

And then he loved her very well.

So, we've got bigamy (though, I suppose his other wife could have died in the pumpkin), and a strange indicator that illiteracy breeds contempt? Still too bizarre to quite accuse it of anything, but simply explaining another wife to the children may have led to it being commonly taken out.

However, maybe it's the original Scotish version of the rhyme that leaves an ominous cast to what, on the surface, seems so innocent:

Peter, my neeper,

Had a wife,

And he couidna' keep her,

He pat her i' the wa',

And lat a' the mice eat her.

Not sure what "wa'" means. But the mice-eating is more than clear.

DNA Disasters on Dexter

This post is a reflection on an event that occurs in the first episode of the fourth season of Dexter. Currently available to watch here.

I'm not giving away any huge spoilers but if you don't want to know anything, or if you're the squeamish type, I wouldn't recommend reading on.

Okay, so the fourth season looks promising and I'm looking forward to its DVD release (no way I'm actually buying Showtime). But I have one bone to pick with the first episode.

Okay, so the new serial killer in town, the Trinity Killer, gets naked and kills a girl in her bathtub. Supposedly he cleans up after himself extraordinarily well. But they find the girl still in the tub floating in the bloody water.

Now here's what I want to know: since the killer was in the tub with her and naked, why couldn't they find his DNA? Did they simply not think to check the water? Seems a terrible oversight. It should have been a cesspool of DNA! If he was naked, all kinds of skin and hair could have been left behind. I suppose he could have let out the water he originally killed her in and filled the tub with new water, but this seems unlikely.

Anyway, perhaps I've just over-thought this whole thing...

Thoughts on Fame

My thoughts on fame based on John's video posted below.

Footsore

I went to San Francisco today with one of my meet-up clubs and it was cool (though not temperature-wise which meant I was lugging around two unnecessary jackets), but we did a loooot of walking and now my feet hate me.

Addicted to Word Clouds

Okay, so above there's a word cloud of my blog, though I highly suspect it only did the entries on the first page.

And here's a word cloud on my children's novel. Unlike my fantasy novel, the main character's name is much smaller because it's from first person perspective. Misty happens to be a girl my main character has a bit of a crush on, and she plays a prominent role in the story, so it makes sense her name is the largest (though I hadn't guessed that it would be). Cat is the name of his best friend, so that also makes sense. It also reaffirms my suspicion that Wordle ignores common words like the, a, I, and other words like those.

Novel Word Cloud

Word cloud of my current draft. Click the pic to see full-size.

I created a word cloud of my complete Fantasy novel on Wordle and here it is. I was rather impressed that Wordle could handle that many words, but upon trying the previous draft of 800+ pages, I appear to have broken Wordle. So I tried again with just a chunk of the previous draft the size of my current draft and below are the results. While I certainly hope my wrtiting style has improved a lot of the words are these are the same except, of course, for the names of characters and creatures that I took out of the current draft.

Word cloud of previous draft.

I Ought to Write Blog Ideas Down...

I always seem to think I'll remember them, but this is sadly not the case. Of course, who's to say they'd be nearly as brillant as I imagine they are when I can't remember them.

Historical Inaccuracies

I've just finished watching the first season of Showtime's series, The Tudors which is basically porn with historical inaccuracies mixed in. Now I like historical fiction, and I'm willing to accept a certain amount of creative license, but I hate it when things are randomly changed seemingly without reason. The Tudors has a lot of these. One of the best examples is the character of Thomas Tallis, who had NOTHING to do with any of the people at court other than writing music for them. He's a completely random character! Plus they couldn't even get his wife's name right. They almost did but then decided to kill her (despite the fact that she outlived him) and have him marry her sister. What? Why?!

To drive home the point one can see above in the official logo that they can't even count to six and I have a bad feeling that it's my favorite wife (Anne of Cleves) who's going to get shafted.

Though it's terribly difficult identifying any of them by their boobs.

Five Little Pumpkins

Five little pumpkins sitting on a gate.
The first one said, "Oh, my it's getting late!"
The second one said, "There are leaves in the air."
The third one said, "But we don't care."
The fourth one said, "Let's run, let's run!"

The fifth one said, "Let's have some fun!"

Then Woooooo went the wind
And OUT went the lights.

And five little pumpkins rolled out of sight.

I may be performing this poem to little kids at the library tomorrow. Hooray!

The Grand Tour: Book Review

The sequel to Sorcery and Cecelia, this book follows Cecelia and Kate as well as their husbands, James and Thomas, on their honeymoon journey across continental Europe. But it's not your usual romantic get-away when the newlyweds soon become embroiled in a mysterious plot where the freedom of all of Europe hangs in the balance.

I liked this book at least as much as the first one, (which I would give five out of five stars), and in some places I even liked this one better because I'm such a sucker for romance. I loved seeing the development of Kate and Thomas's relationship.

My biggest complaint for this book is that we see almost nothing of James and Cecy's relationship as a married couple. True, it made sense that Cecy wasn't about to put the intricacies of her relationship into a deposition, but I would have preferred if they were both diary entries if that was the only reason to withhold that part of the story. Aside from the romance, I also felt in many places that Cecy's deposition contained too much intimate information to believably be a witness statement. For instance, she makes particular reference to members of her family, like Aunt Elizabeth, as if the reader should know them. So, even if the writing was not changed, the deposition would have been far more credible as diary entries.

I just had to console myself by imagining that James and Cecy's private bedroom activities and conversation, unlike the sweet nothings and elliptical references from Kate, were deemed too adult to be included in a children's book. This actually seemed believable for the characters--Cecy being markedly less shy than Kate. Of course, there's also the fact that Kate's part is written by Caroline Stevermer who has written for adults, whereas Wrede is most notably a children's author.

I'm currently awaiting the third book, The Mislaid Magician, at the Sacramento Public Library. I was a little miffed that I couldn't get it from the Roseville Public Library, since it's so much closer. I could recommend they get it, but it's faster for me simply to stop being so lazy and go to the other library.

My one romantic quibble aside, the story itself is an excellent follow-up to the first. I highly recommend both the first and the second books of this series, and I only hope the third book is as good as the first two.

Never Doubt a Librarian With Too Much Time on Her Hands

I mentioned to some people today that they sometimes dye oranges orange. They didn't believe me. But, voila!

http://www.fda.gov/ICECI/ComplianceManuals/CompliancePolicyGuidanceManual/ucm074540.htm

http://www.fda.gov/Food/FoodSafety/HazardAnalysisCriticalControlPointsHACCP/JuiceHACCP/ucm082931.htm

http://www.fda.gov/ForIndustry/ColorAdditives/ColorAdditiveInventories/ucm115641.htm

Bowling

Tomorrow I go bowling with one of the clubs I joined. I haven't been bowling since I was about eight years old at Kyle Wojtaszek's birthday party. I remember they put these long round cushions in the gutter for us kids. I also happen to be a fair hand at Wii bowling. I suspect neither of these previous experiences will help me.

Teach or Taught?

Sometimes I have the overwhelming desire to teach rather than be taught to. Despite the fact that I've never wanted to teach professionally, this issue has plagued me all my life. For instance, if I'm in a classroom or training environment, and I feel I know a lot about the subject being taught, it's very difficult for me not to answer questions my fellow students or trainees ask or--far worse--begin lecturing myself. I almost never actually do this because I find the desire embarrassing. Still, I've had many a professor cease to call on me in class because I participate too much. But it involves a lot of repression on my part not to share what I know. I'm also never sure if I'm doing the right thing when I do repress. Certainly, it's good to listen because we can always learn knew ideas. But in the zeal to curb my desire to express, I often don't share my knowledge even when it would be appropriate to do so. I'm always afraid of being seen as an insufferable know-it-all.

However, the one place where I feel free to share knowledge is while working in a library. It helps a lot that people are coming to me for it. So at least this otherwise inconvenient tick has helped me to choose a profession.

The Year of Living Biblically: A Book Review

I had previously attempted to read A.J. Jacob's previous book about reading the encyclopedia all the way through. It was amusing, but at times felt a bit too much like I was reading the encyclopedia all the way through, and I confess I didn't have the fortitude to continue. In this book Jacobs also said he sometimes googles his name to read reviews. On the small chance that he should stumble on mine, I should add that I read Know-it-All in a book club and my opinion was in the minority. And it may also have been influenced by the fact that I disagreed with the selection of the book based on the fact that it was book club for young adult book club and I didn't believe that Know-it-All was ever intended for a teen audience. At least, not specifically for them. This isn't to say teens cannot read and enjoy just about anything, but if one makes the argument that any book a teen can read is a teen book, then there hardly seems any point in making it a category at all.

But I digress.

I thought I might only read passages of The Year of Living Biblically, but I did actually read and enjoy this book from cover to cover. Unlike the encyclopedia, I have always wanted a better understanding of the Bible, but have never had the discipline to teach myself. Jacobs made it easy with his sometimes hilarious and sometimes moving personal journey. Even when I didn't agree with Jacobs' interpretations, I appreciated that he supplied as much information as he could. A blurb on the back calls it a cliff-notes version of the Bible, and that it is, mixed in with autobiography and comedy--my favorite sort of non-fiction.

One also has to admire the open-mindedness with which Jacobs approached this quest. As I said, I may not have always agreed with his conclusions, but you have to respect someone who treats other people with so much respect--particularly when so many others simply think they're crazy.

I also really enjoyed how much this quest involved Jacobs family. Perhaps it was because I didn't get much further than half-way in his previous book, but his family was something I felt lacking. He would mention how he and his wife were trying so hard to get pregnant that sex had become a chore (another thing I thought a teen would have trouble relating to), but his quest to read all the encyclopedias was so totally unrelated to his personal life that it just wasn't the same as his desire to seek religion in hopes he could raise his son better. And perhaps it's voyeristic, but I was pleased to hear so much about his wife and how she was responding to the things he would do. Though I also could not help but feel that it would be an entirely different, and much darker, quest for a woman to take the bible literally. Particularly from the bits of sexism that Jacobs could really only note indirectly or after the fact, such as the Hasidic women not being included in joyous dancing or women not being touched while they're "impure." However, I did enjoy it immensly when his wife had sat in every seat in the house while she was impure.

I also enjoyed the intern/slave towards the end and laughed out loud at dozens of other things I can't quite recall.

Still, I was expecting something a little harsher, but I was pleased to find that it would be difficult to become angry or offended with Jacobs for so honest a quest. At the same time, it still had its hilarious moments along with the insightful ones. I would feel comfortable recommending it to just about anyone, regardless of their stance on the Bible.

Eternal Seasons

Lovely picture from this blog because I fell asleep early and the sun went down before I could take my own.

The weather is generally a safe topic, but it needn't be as superficial as some people make it. I was out today in the brisk, sunny California autumn of 79 degree weather, walking past hanging pots still brimming with multi-colored flowers and candy-scented shops in one of the many shopping centers surrounding my home. I occurred to me I'm in what many people would consider paradise. I'm even in a particularly nice corner of paradise. Anything I could possibly need is within three miles of my house, most of it right across the street, and much of it has a nicely manicured Disneylandish quality to it. Actually, it's a lot cleaner than Disneyland and probably prettier with even more foliage. But if that all becomes too commercial, I can retreat to the nature reserve right behind my house.

Still, I confess I miss autumn. Proper autumn where the trees turn to flame and the air puts one in mind of apples and pumpkins. The smell of real autumn is already fading from my memory despite not even having been here a full year, and I'm not sure I could do it justice with what I do remember. Something about the leaves changing makes it smell sweet and spicy, a smell that perfectly fits the word russet.

I'll probably never miss barren trees or having all the moisture in my nose crystallize the moment I walk outside. But I do miss the feeling that time has truly passed. When I began to see Halloween decorations here, I was confused. It wasn't October, it couldn't be. It feels more like April. The trees here feel the same. A few are reluctantly changing perhaps one branch of leaves but the rest seem to think that green is the new orange. Regardless, I realized that, according to the calendar, I was wrong, and I would just have to get used to the sight of pumpkins and palm trees.

Wrong Overload

Has anyone ever said something to you that is so wrong that it just overloaded your brain and you couldn't come up with a good response because so many good responses flooded into your brain at once that it's a cerebral traffic jam that ends in you saying nothing at all?

Star Wars Dismemberment

Awesome. That's dedication. Even I never counted the number of severed hands.

Mini Golf!

I don't think I've been mini golfing since I went with Tim in high school, but today I shall once again tread the AstroTurf and face down the windmills with all the bravery (and probable insanity) of a modern Don Quixote.

Dream Therapy?

So I had a dream that I was so angry at my mother and sister that I was throwing a tantrum much like a toddler. I was throwing soft items and yelling too. In the dream my mother had scheduled a driving class for me, but she hadn't checked with me first, so I couldn't go to it because I didn't have a permit. Yes, a rather stupid reason to be so upset even though there was a nonrefundable fee involved. But this is my dream self and my waking self can lie and pretend I never get that irrationally upset. I think I was so upset in the dream I may have growled in my sleep.

Then the dream meandered quite drastically and I was in a limousine with Draco Malfoy. Apparently we were a couple (and I'll never need to learn to drive with a chauffeur! But, of course, in my dream I'd already forgotten all about that). Then I was flying around my old college campus (sans Draco).

So, yes, quite a bizzare dream, but even more bizzare is how I felt afterwards. Completely relaxed, a feeling that has stayed with me the whole day. Yesterday I was stressed-out, anxious, and overwhelmed. Today I was completely mellow. When I think about what was bothering me so much yesterday, it barely seems to register as a problem. I've gone back to feeling like all I can do is try my best and just not worry about the rest. Which is, of course, always the logical recourse, but somehow today it's far easier to believe than yesterday.

So, hopefully this isn't a sign of some strange mental disorder. (I may be mellow, but I'm still a mellow hypochondriac). I only wish I really understood what shift in brian chemistry caused this sudden peace of mind so I could work at feeling the same in the future. Was it the extra sleep? I usually get a lot of sleep, though. True, the day I was stressed, I hadn't gotten much sleep because I had volunteer training in the morning. So I suppose maybe I just feel better by contrast. But I have a hard time believing that. This is as close to peace as I've been in a long time, no matter how much sleep I've had. Was it some extra vitamin in my food? The only change in life-style lately is that I started putting a nightly mask of honey on my face to soften my skin. Did the honey seep through my skin into my brain?

Or is there some kind of subconscious mediator in my head? Some mix between anger and anxiety management?

American Gods: Book Review

This was a difficult book to read, took me a long time, and I don't properly remember all of it, so this may influence my overall opinion.

Oh, how to summarize American Gods... Well, on the surface, it's the story of a man named Shadow who, after being released from prison, finds that his wife is dead, and a strange man named Wednesday draws him into an ancient conflict. Stranded in America by the original immigrants, the gods of the old lands are painfully fading. Scraping by on whatever worship or sacrifice they can capture through art or trickery. They are beset by the new gods of technology and consumerism. In one last effort at survival, Wednesday, with Shadow's often reluctant help, works to convince the gods band together to fight one last battle for survival.

But there's so much more to it than that. Much like Gaiman's sprawling Sandman series, this novel is made up of thousands of different threads. It's like a tapestry where a single thread might be beautiful, plain, or even ugly. But you must step back to see the whole picture.

When stories are told like this, I can never quite say that I personally loved or hated the whole. Part of the story will stick with me while other parts seem wholly unsatisfactory. However, it is more in the way that I find certain aspects of life that the book addresses to be unsatisfactory. So the portrayal is not necessarily incorrect. I can never say that any of it doesn't fit. All I can definitely say is that the novel is well written, expertly planned, and powerfully poignant. The complex and varied nature of the narrative fit the subject of gods well.

Still, it's a long, dark journey.

* * * * *

Now I'll address specific parts of the story for all those who have read it. If you haven't and don't want to know specific plot points, I would recommend you stop reading now.

So, the ending is freshest in my mind. I have to say it didn't have the resolution I generally crave in a story, so personally, especially after so long a book, it did not sit well with me. But, then again, that is life. I can't quarrel with the truth of it. And after reading it again and thinking about it I cannot say it is simple or without meaning. The coin in the air, for me, represented the fleeting nature of life. Not waiting to see it fall seemed to me a rejection of any predestination, not wanting to see the outcome life. Plus, I thought the gold of the coin could represent the sun, just as the silver coin was the moon. Since the moon guided Shadow in death, it makes sense that the sun would guide him in life. This is supported by his last location being Iceland during the time of the year when the sun practically never sets. Still, even in Iceland, someone wishes him a happy fourth of July. Even when he's not in America, some of it has come with him-importantly, the independence aspect.

I could go on, but I won't. It is well written in the sense that I could probably write an entire thesis on the last chapter alone. Now that I examine it, I think it may have been the independence part that bothered me. On one hand, it ties in nicely with one of my favorite lines toward the end:

"I think I would rather be a man than a god. We don't need anyone to believe in us. We just keep going anyhow. It's what we do."

So from the perspective of the novel, humans are independent of worship. At least, of a need to be worshipped. Though many would like to be worshiped. Still, for reasons I won't get into in this blog, I often don't feel Americans in general are nearly as independent as Shadow is represented at the end of this book. I don't mind that Gaiman is British. Oftentimes I think it takes an informed outside perspective to truly see a country. But I suppose I've also lived too long in America. I can't be happy with the entire tapestry anymore than I can all aspects of America.