Avatar: Film Review

Okay, so I was sorta wrong that there wouldn't be any lines at Avatar. There was a big line when we went to see it at the IMAX, but I still contend that this was NOT a nerd line. Nerd lines involve dressing up and camping out for days in tents. Now, this wouldn't really be necessary at the IMAX since seats are assigned, but I doubt anyone was camping out all day with their face painted blue anywhere else. But if anyone can prove me wrong, I'd be interested to hear it.

However, Avatar is undoubtably a sell-out blockbuster. I won't argue about that. My sister and I didn't have the forethought to buy tickets in advance, so we were stuck in the very front row of the IMAX watching the movie with our heads tilted back and a stupid rail obscuring the bottom few inches of the screen. But it wasn't actually as bad as it sounds and I could still see it all right for the most part. Some of the scenes might have been better further back, I think being too close can sometimes blur the 3D a little. But it was clear 90% of the time. So I was able to appreciate that the effects were very good. However, people may call me crazy, but I can still tell the difference between computer animation and reality most of the time, even with today's effects. The reason being that the textures in computer animated worlds are often too pretty and clean. Even when they add dirt, I think it's beceause all the grime and imperfections of the real world are too unpredictable to entirely replicate. Still, other than that one problem that I have with all computer generation, it was definitely photorealistic.

As for the plot. Do any of you remember Fern Gully? For any who never saw it, Fern Gully was a cartoon from my childhood where a fairy teams up with a human to save the rainforest. Well, as the man behind us in the IMAX accurately summed up, Avatar is Fern Gully in space. Not the worst plot, but by no means the most original.

Still, it's probably the only movie I'd recommend seeing on the strength of the visual effects alone. If you can, see it at an IMAX in 3D and it'll be more like an amusement park ride than a movie, so the plot won't matter much. The plot also wasn't so bad as to ruin the "ride." It just would never have been a blockbuster just on the strength of the plot alone, and I'm interested in how that will affect DVD sales for this film.

Spoilers

And then Christa and the guy whose name I don't remember saved the rainforest. The end.

Okay, not exactly but not far off. I have to say one of the biggest highlights to this film for me was when Jake adjusted his thong after first becoming part of the tribe.

The Enterprise on Star Trek has been said to move at the speed of plot. The dang Tree of Souls in this movie felt the same. After Jake and the alien chick have bestiality alien sex under this one tree that looks and acts remarkably like the Tree of Souls, the tree is bull-dozed.

However, later in the film they are, once again, protecting the Tree of Souls? Is this just part that escaped bull-dozing, or is it another Tree of Souls? If it's another Tree of Souls, how many are there? Because if there's a lot, then it's pretty weird to put all your energy into protecting just one. And if there were two, why are there two? Is one a back-up tree?

And it seemed rather serendipitous that the aliens were just close enough to human to be sexy. But this is not the first sci-fi to do that and, sadly, it's highly unlikely it'll be the last.

Clearly, though, this plot was not made for too much logical scrutiny.

But as environmental parables go, it was okay. I was actually rooting for the humans to lose. I'd like to say this was because the story did a good job helping us sympathize with the aliens. But this would be patently untrue. In reality, I'm afraid it's quite likely that a part of my psyche just hates humanity and wants to see its butt kicked by dazzlingly attractive, CGI, blue people. I take comfort in the fact that clearly I'm not the only one.